So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
