i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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