i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
