Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
