u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Randomize
