So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Randomize
