And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
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