I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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