the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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