it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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