they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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