how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I need a burrito and a hug.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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