I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
