So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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