Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
