Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(518): View more from New York

Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?

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(518): Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs? http://tfl.nu/bc57

Replies (21) Good night (663) Bad night (2112)
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(760): View more from California

I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.

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(760): I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college. http://tfl.nu/m4jf

Replies (52) Good night (4516) Bad night (843)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."

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(732): you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy." http://tfl.nu/a1we

Replies (91) Good night (22077) Bad night (3422)
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(414): View more from Wisconsin

i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her

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(414): i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her http://tfl.nu/iw7s

Replies (13) Good night (1452) Bad night (4212)
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(701): View more from North Dakota

entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place

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(701): entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place http://tfl.nu/zqzf

Replies (8) Good night (6387) Bad night (1583)
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(207): View more from Maine

Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.

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(207): Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina. http://tfl.nu/f26o

Replies (43) Good night (12063) Bad night (1483)
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(716): View more from New York

He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.

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(716): He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly. http://tfl.nu/0f1o

Replies (5) Good night (930) Bad night (1568)
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(319): View more from Iowa

Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?

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(319): Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be? http://tfl.nu/gqtw

Replies (13) Good night (827) Bad night (1309)
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(719): View more from Colorado

Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night

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(719): Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night http://tfl.nu/la5y

Replies (6) Good night (1538) Bad night (674)
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(914): View more from New York

I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr

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(914): I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr http://tfl.nu/3ptr

Replies (3) Good night (1007) Bad night (405)
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(231): View more from Michigan

he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0

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(231): he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0 http://tfl.nu/ayul

Replies (6) Good night (423) Bad night (678)
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(416): View more from Toronto

well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself

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(416): well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself http://tfl.nu/ylfg

Replies (4) Good night (736) Bad night (358)
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(254): View more from Texas

We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)

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(254): We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :) http://tfl.nu/s9j9

Replies (8) Good night (815) Bad night (377)
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(302): View more from Delaware

He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him

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(302): He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him http://tfl.nu/krgi

Replies (1) Good night (678) Bad night (208)
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(224): View more from Illinois

I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going?

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(224): I am the fucking FIFTH wheel. How do you think it's going? http://tfl.nu/028y

Replies (2) Good night (141) Bad night (394)

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