Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize