I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
