a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
Randomize
