ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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