Midget sex pt 2 tonight
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
