pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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