I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
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