how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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