What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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