Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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