if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Randomize
