we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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