Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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