Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize
