Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
