There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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