cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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