oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Randomize
