This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
