i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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