just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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