I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
