Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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