I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
