i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
