Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
