at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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