The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
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