woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
