exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Randomize
