Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
