He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
