Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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