Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
