dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
